I know it’s dull to have to listen to other people’s stories of when they were drunk and how hilarious/embarassing it was, but I feel I have to share this in the hope that by writing it down for everyone to see I somehow make it less bad. Or I make some kind of shift happen in the space-time continuum and it never happened.
That was a somewhat dramatic build up to a blog post which is essentially just going to be me moaning about how embarrassing I was last night.
I’m not even sure why I drink any more. It makes me ill and I’m not really the ‘win friends and influence people’ type when I’m drunk. For example, I spent last night in the Willow on gay night asking a group of boys if they were gay and if they weren’t gay why were they here without any women? I then concluded that it simply must be because they were into MMORPGs and was very shocked when they told me they didn’t like World of Warcraft. Does that make sense to you? Because it doesn’t to me. Well, it did then, but it certainly doesn’t now. I think they then decided I had something mentally wrong with me and spent the night looking at me sheepishly like they were worried I was going to suddenly flip. Unsurprisingly.
That is only one of the many things I have done to humiliate myself. I don’t believe I will ever be taken seriously again. I fear I haven’t impressed upon you exactly how much I went on at these poor boys. I am officially a twat. If I see anyone I saw last night ever again I am going to tell them that it wasn’t my fault and I had my drink spiked. Or that I have an evil twin and she’s a dick.
Today I am going to stay indoors and play Kingdom Hearts. I think it’s for the best.